The DECIDE Process

1. Define the Problem: Your friend/s ask you to sneak out to go to a party-- the dimensions of wellness that would affect me would be social/ emotional/ occupational wellness and whatever I choose, there will be positive and negative results because this is a problem that is hard to deal with- wether telling your friends or parents your decision

2. Explore the Alternatives: Here is a list of options to act on: 1) Don't tell my mom and sneak out but make it back home on curfew 2) Tell my mom I am going for a sleepover but actually go to the party-- sleep at friends house after party 3) Tell my friend that I can't go because I'm sick 4) Convince my mom to let me go- do what she says 5) Convince my friend to have the party at some more appropriate time where I can go telling my mom

3. Consider the Consequences: 1) If I make it back on time(I can have fun at the party), no one will notice but there is a 50% chance my mom will check up on me and will be mad/ worried if I'm not there 2) I will have a great time at the party and my mom will never know (10% chance she will find out if she calls my friends mom about the sleepover-- she will be mad) 3) My mom will not get mad but I'll be sad not going to the party-- friends would probably ask to come some other time and I would have to lie again about not going 4) My mom will probably let me go but under a strict curfew but if she doesn't let me go, my friends would be probably mad I didn't sneak out 5) My friends would probably not change the time and would be mad that I can't just sneak out but my mom would be fine if the time was during the day where I could go.

4. Identify Your Values: First of all, just sneaking out and not telling my parents even if I make it back on time will go against my values. I would feel extremely guilty the next day and going would make me not to trust myself anymore and if my parents were to find out, they would be disappointed more than mad. There are also risk factors when it comes to sneaking out in unknown locations and if my parents don't know where I am, then I would not feel safe or comfortable. Since options 1 and 2 violate these values, I would not choose them. Secondly, lying is also not the answer. Once you start lying, you would get tangled in a web of them and it would just make me feel bad and regretful, hence making option 3 not good. Overall, if any options go against my values of honesty and safety in this situation, I would not pick them.

5. Decide and Act: If this situation were ever there, I would go with option 4 (Convince my mom to let me go- do what she says). I would convince my mom to let me go but I would have a curfew- to make it easier, we could arrange for my friend to drop me home so I would be safer. If she lets me go, I would feel better rather than sneaking off where I would have felt guilty and not have had as good of a time. However, if my mom would say no, I would be fine with it and convince her to let me go some other time.

6. Evaluate the Results: First of all, this decision does not go against my values because I would not be lying to my parents nor my friends which is a positive result. Telling her and not sneaking out would make her trust me more and after a few times, she would let me go to a party. I think this decision was the right one because even if she said no and I would have been sad and maybe even mad, I would not feel guilty, I would feel relieved that I did the right thing. This decision would strengthen my relationship with my parents as it would be more open and this decision would have taught me that my family is always understanding and the person asking me to sneak out is not really my friend because they know it would against my values. This decision would benefit my social, emotional and occupational wellness in a positive way.