1. Righteousness is a quality that is difficult to attain because it is a multi-step process. It is not something that you can gain overnight but rather it is formed through experiences that truly test your character. Part of the first step on the path of the righteous is Muhasbah, which entails taking responsibility for your faults in order to develop your character. In this letter, I will attempt to implement this primary step by looking at my personal shortcomings and areas for improvement in the various steps on the path of the righteous.
2. Reflection 4: Taqwa
2.1. Importance
2.1.1. It is step 0 on the path of the righteous. Taqwa builds your connection with Allah, and stops you from sinning and doing things He dislikes.
2.2. Shortcoming
2.2.1. Spending too much time on entertainment and relaxation.
2.2.1.1. Improvement:
2.2.1.2. Entertainment is halal but it is better to spend my time on good deeds as it is a level of Taqwa. I can schedule out my relaxation by setting a time limit for myself when I sit down to watch TV so I don't go overboard and lose track of time.
2.2.2. Stressing over small things. Strong Taqwa will stop me from this because it gives me relief from worries and a way out of problems.
2.2.2.1. Watching the news will make my worries seem insignificant and make me feel grateful. Making dhikr from my heart will help with stress. I can also manage my time, break my work into chunks, prioritize, and talk to someone about my stress.
2.2.3. Listening to music (a doubtful matter).
2.2.3.1. Stop listening to it and seek forgiveness for it because Taqwa entails avoiding doubtful matters and leaving what makes the heart unsettled. Transition to more Nasheeds and then slowly wean off of that and listen to Quran. This way if I get tempted to listen to a song more than wanting to hear the Quran, the guilt itself will stop me.
2.3. Notes
2.3.1. Sign 3 of having Taqwa, level 3 & 4 of Taqwa, 1st benefit of Taqwa, how to have good intentions for relaxation.
3. Thesis
4. Reflection 1: Detachment from the worldly (Qana'ah & Tawakkul)
4.1. Importance
4.1.1. Not having Tawakkul is a sign of hypocrisy, an evil disease of the heart and soul. If we rely on Allah, we will have Qana'ah. With contentment, our Nafs will be pure so difficulties won't affect us too much. Contentment makes you turn to the Akhira with persistence and ambition and Islam with knowledge and hard work.
4.2. Shortcoming
4.2.1. Sometimes blessings escape my mind when I am faced with a hardship and my thoughts are consumed by how unfortunate I am for having to go through it.
4.2.1.1. Improvements:
4.2.1.2. Ask myself, “If I can accept the good gladly, shouldn’t I have to accept the bad gladly too?” Writing out all my blessings and challenges will give me perspective. Remember that Allah (swt) decreed this for a reason beyond my wisdom.
4.2.2. I don't usually give sadaqah from my own money. I don't do anything special to help the poor and needy.
4.2.2.1. I should volunteer for charitable organizations or join clubs like HOPE or IHCC. When my family members give sadaqah, I should contribute some money of my own and not think that I am too young for that because I'm not. Don't just ignore the homeless people and walk past them. Giving them will give me Qana'ah.
4.2.3. Momentary feelings of wishing I had something that someone else has, especially when I am on social media - that's not contentment.
4.2.3.1. Don't compare myself to others and stop looking at random people's posts about their lives because it is something that shouldn't concern me. Set limits on social media to avert your gaze from what you don't have.
4.3. Notes:
4.3.1. Number 3- 6 from descriptions of Qana'ah & first 2 points under Tawaakul.
5. Reflection 2: Salah
5.1. Importance: If you perfect Salah, everything else will follow and you are promised Jannah. First thing we will be held accountable for on the Day of Judgement.
5.2. Shortcoming:
5.2.1. Deficiency in prayer includes praying them late, which is something I should work harder on not doing.
5.2.1.1. Improvements:
5.2.1.2. Set a notification with the athan on my phone because since I can't go to the masjid, it is the only way to hear it and it will help me remember to pray right when the time comes in and not delay.
5.2.2. Treating Salah like a task I have to finish to get back to my everyday activities.
5.2.2.1. Understand that Salah is the main thing and everything else is a distraction. Think about how empty you feel without prayer and how you need Salah, Allah doesn't need it.
5.2.3. Losing attentiveness and distracted thoughts.
5.2.3.1. Pray in my own room to remove distractions, pray as if it is your last prayer, make a to-do list so you're not thinking about everything you have to do in Salah, concentrate on the meanings, and clear your mind right before.
5.3. Notes: Point 1, 5 and 7 under virtue of 5 daily prayers and point 1 and 2 under how to make the heart alive in prayer.
6. Reflection 3: Ikhlas
6.1. Importance:
6.1.1. Ikhlas is a necessity because it is a wajib action. You will not only be off of Allah’s path without Ikhlas, but you will also gain His wrath. Without Ikhlas, your faith will be weak.
6.2. Shortcoming:
6.2.1. Giving too much importance to what people think/say about me. If they praise me I get very happy and if they criticize me I take it to heart. Also, if I have to pray in a public place where there are many non-Muslims, I feel conscious and a little awkward to pray in front of them because I am afraid of what they will think.
6.2.1.1. Improvement:
6.2.1.2. If you think about death and the Akhira often, you will realize that no matter how highly people think of you, no one can help you after you die except Allah. Remember that their opinion doesn't matter, Allah's does so you are doing it for Him.
6.2.2. At this point in my life when I'm beginning to choose what career I want to pursue, I look at how much money it makes first.
6.2.2.1. I should change my intention to serve the community for the sake of Allah instead of for money. Don't give so much importance to worldly benefits when making an important decision, especially if it's associated with a good deed because the reward of it might be nullified. Remember that all money and possessions will be left behind.
6.3. Notes: 3 Signs of Ikhlas and 2 types of Riya
7. Reflection 5: Dhikr and Quran
7.1. Importance
7.1.1. Dhikr is important because no one will reach Allah (swt) without it and it's a pillar on the path of the righteous. It purifies the heart and burns sins.
7.2. Shortcomings
7.2.1. I sometimes make dhikr for the sake of it and don't get lost in it. I do it just with my tongue while my heart is not truly feeling what I am saying.
7.2.1.1. Improvements:
7.2.1.2. Do dhikr slowly and reflect over the meaning as you say it. For example, if you are saying Alhamdulillah, think about everything you have to be grateful for. Make sure you know the meanings of whatever you are reciting firstly.
7.2.2. Whenever I feel like it I will recite a lot of Quran at once, but I won't continue in the same manner for the following days.
7.2.2.1. Be consistent by reciting a small amount, even if it is a few ayahs, but do it everyday.
7.2.3. I don't know the meaning of what I am reciting in the Quran, except for the 30th juz. I can't do Tadabbur since I don't understand it.
7.2.3.1. I should make a goal to read the translation of the whole Quran and also think about the meaning and give more importance to understanding it rather than only memorizing it.
7.3. Notes
7.3.1. Hadith 4 & 5 under Recitation of the Quran and quote number 1 and 2 about Dhikr.