The Reciprocating Self: Human Development in Theological Perspective mind map by Sue Trigger

1. The Self and the Divine Other: We are created to be in relationship with God. This relationship is unique, united, and reciprocal in nature.

1.1. Communion with God does not deny our particularity. p. 45 TRS

1.2. A person's relationship with God is unique by virtue of the created and the Creator and the unity between them. p. 46 TRS

1.3. To be human is not an exclusive relationship with God, but with other humans. Through this reciprocal relationship we also enable others to become the person God created them to be. p. 47 TRS

2. The Self and the Human Other: Martin Buber and the I/Thou relationship illustrates that one is not dominant but reciprocal.

2.1. Violations of the I/Thou theory illustrate unequal relationships in which one exacts power over another. It-thou, it-it, and I-it. pp. 49-54.

2.2. The reciprocating self is fully unique and yet fully engaged with another in all of their peculiarities.

3. "God's intention for human development is for us to become particular beings in relationship with the divine and the human other." p. 55 TRS

4. A Trinitarian Analogy of Being and Becoming pp. 31-55

4.1. Imago Dei and Human Development: "...the goal of human development as God intends, is the reciprocating self." p. 36 TRS

4.2. "To live according to God's design is to glorify God as a distinct human being in communion with God and others in mutually giving and receiving relationships." p. 37 TRS

4.3. Theology of Particularity: Each person is unique with different skills, talents, and identities.

4.4. Human particularities are essential to unity. Our relatedness is impacted by our particularities.

4.5. Theology of Relationality: Humans reflect the relationality of the triune God. To be human is to be created for relationship with God and others.

4.6. "The image of God does not lie in the individual, but in the relationality of the persons in community." p. 40 Stan Grenz (2002)

5. Reciprocating Relationships pp. 56-75

5.1. Relationships That Form a Reciprocating Self: The reciprocating self is best nurtured in covenant relationships of unconditional love. p. 57 TRS

5.2. This maturing of a reciprocal self is a developmental process nurtured by levels of covenant, grace, empowering and intimacy. p. 57 TRS

5.3. Humans are unable to enter into a covenant relationship at the degree God can. We are prone to failure.

5.4. 1. Covenant relationship is extended by God without choice by the human.

5.5. Covenant is an unconditional commitment demonstrated most perfectly by God. pp. 60 - 64 TRS

5.6. 2. God strongly desires a response from humans to enter into covenant relationship.

5.7. 3. Potential benefits within the covenant are optional and must be accepted by the human.

5.8. "Covenantal relationships are based on unconditional commitments, but they can be either unilateral (one-way) or reciprocal (two-way)." A true relationship must be reciprocal. p. 62. TRS

5.9. Grace: Covenant relationship is grace. p. 64-66

5.10. Grace in human relationships reveals God to us.

5.11. A relationship of grace will share forgiveness when one fails the other.

5.12. "Grace means that order and regularity are present for the sake of the needs and enhancement of each person in the relationship, and not as a means of repressing and limiting the other." p. 99 TRS

5.13. Empowering: One person uses his or her power on behalf of another. pp. 66-70

5.14. Jesus redefined power by showing that power is to be used for the other.

5.15. Empowerment is intentionally enabling another to acquire power.

5.16. Empowerment is not controlling, but reciprocal between people in mutually enhancing ways.

5.17. Empowerment is unconditional love and grace in action.

5.18. Intimacy: To Know and Be Known. God wants to know us and be known by us. pp. 71-73

5.19. A relationship that includes mutuality of grace and empowering becomes an intimate relationship of knowing.

5.20. Intimacy is relationship in which there is honest sharing, forgiveness, and submissiveness that is mutual and interdependent.

5.21. Sin: Missing the Mark in Reciprocal Relationships A failure to be in right relationship with God and others. pp. 73- 75

5.22. Humans fall short of living into the fullness of reciprocity God offers us.

5.23. Renewal is found in God's intervention of forgiveness

6. The Importance of Reciprocity: Reciprocity holds uniqueness and unity together. Unique and distinct but inextricably bound together.

6.1. Humans experience their uniqueness most fully within the context of relationships.

6.2. Humans bear the imago dei through their actions, working for the good of God, others, and all creation.

7. The Reciprocating Self and Developmental Theory pp.76-103

7.1. Psychoanalytic Theory: the interplay between biological and parental influence. Sigmund Freud

7.2. Limited in it's lack of relational influence outside of parents, and how the self can change through relationships with others.

7.3. Objects Relation Theory: a useful understanding of the development of the reciprocating self.

7.4. Adequate holding environment gives a child transitional space where he/she can be alone and discover personal identity and the true self. The true self is aware of and comfortable it's uniqueness.

7.5. Social Learning Theory: Children learn from the modeling of important people in their lives. pp. 84-88

7.6. Change is caused by both environmental stimuli and the child's self-determination.

7.7. Symbolic Interaction Theory: the sum total of self concepts an individual has. pp. 88-91

7.8. Self-understanding is marked by seeing oneself in relation to the groups in which they belong.

7.9. Cognitive Development Theory: Jean Piaget, children construct their own reality. p. 92

7.10. Language acquisition contributes to the ability to see oneself as an object and thus define oneself.

7.11. Social Context and Scaffolding; Vygotsky A child's social context promotes language acquisition. pp. 92-98

7.12. Mental representations are dependent on the social context. People in a child's life are very important to development.

7.13. Experiences build upon each other as the child matures and throughout life.

8. The Reciprocal Self and the Relational Developmental Systems Paradigm pp. 104-127

8.1. The RDS paradigm is an integrative approach to human development that recognizes the importance of relationality.

8.2. Relationalism: development happens through both relationships and context throughout all of life.

8.3. Bronfrenbrenner: Roles and Ecosystems: Development moves through a variety of relational contexts with unique possibilities.

8.4. Biology of Relationships and Reciprocity: the mechanics of the human brain also plays a role in human development. Development is a web of dynamic relationships and contexts. Family, neighborhood, community, and culture.

8.5. Culture and Generations: history shapes identity for individuals, communities, and social institutions.