Rejection Proof - Jia Jiang

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Rejection Proof - Jia Jiang by Mind Map: Rejection Proof  - Jia Jiang

1. Every Rejection has Upside(s)

1.1. Motivation

1.1.1. Michael Jordan

1.2. Resilience and Anti Fragile

1.2.1. Nasim Talib

1.2.2. CHaracter building

1.3. We Learn and Improve next time

1.4. Exercise

1.4.1. 1. GO back to a time when you felt really rejected/turned down

1.4.2. 2. Looking back, how did that rejection help you?

1.4.2.1. Motivation?

1.4.2.2. Resilience?

1.4.2.3. Handling Pressure?

1.4.2.4. New learnings?

1.4.2.5. New strategies?

2. Rejection is a personal opinion

2.1. Dependent on the rejector's personal bias

2.1.1. Education

2.1.2. Culture

2.1.3. Upbringing

2.1.4. Family

2.1.5. Current emotional State

2.2. Its not an indictment on your self worth

2.3. Exercise

2.3.1. Write about all the personal biases the Rejector has which could have caused this rejection

3. Rejection Pain = Physical Pain

3.1. When we encounter physical pain, our brain releases opioid to deal with the pain and lessen it. But the same happens when we get socially rejected.

3.1.1. - University of Michigan study - Students were shown pictures and asked who they wanted to date - Then they were told that the other person was not interested - Had the same opioid release

3.2. In the past - Social rejection could equal death

4. Every Rejection has a  number

4.1. Fight through enough no’s and you will eventually find a yes.

4.2. Examples

4.2.1. Rocky

4.2.1.1. 100 NOs

4.2.2. Zen and the art of motorcycle maintanence

4.2.2.1. 112 rejections

4.3. More rejections you are willing to face

4.3.1. More valuable the object of your desire is to you

4.4. Exercise

4.4.1. Why before BYE

4.4.1.1. Ask them

4.4.1.1.1. Why did they say NO?

4.4.1.1.2. How could I have improved?

5. Don't Reject Yourself

5.1. We reject ourselves more than the world will ever reject us

5.1.1. Thats the ultimate battle

5.1.2. When we shy away from rejection, we are rejecting ourselves even before anyone else does

5.2. The greatest lesson = no matter what, don’t be ignored by the world.

5.2.1. When we reject ourselves we are ignored by the world

6. Embrace Rejection TO become rejection proof

6.1. Beautiful Paradox

6.1.1. The only way is to Embrace rejection

6.2. As soon as you stop running away from it, it becomes your greatest Ally/gift

6.2.1. Its a part of life

6.2.2. No big deal

6.2.3. Now you have power over it

7. Getting to YES

7.1. Exercise

7.1.1. Positioning for Yes

7.1.1.1. Give a why for your request

7.1.1.1.1. Any Why is better than NO why

7.1.1.2. Start with I

7.1.1.3. Ack Doubts

7.1.1.3.1. 1. What doubts might they have?

7.1.1.3.2. 2. Acknowledge them in your conversation

7.1.2. Handling a No

7.1.2.1. Retreat not rout

7.1.2.2. Collaborate dont contend