1. Cancel their debt
1.1. Matthew 18:32–33 (NLT) 32 Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’
1.2. Matthew 18:34–35 (NLT) 34 Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt. 35 “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.”
1.2.1. They deserve it...my anger is a righteous anger. Let me encourage you... Jesus only turned the tables over once. Every other of the 1,277 days of his public ministry he was an instrument of peace, a healer to the sick, a friend to the foreigner, and for giver to the sinner
2. AN INVISIBLE ROOT ALWAYS YIELDS VISIBLE FRUIT
2.1. BITTERNESS POISONS OTHERS
2.1.1. Hebrews 12:14–15 (NLT) 14 Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. 15 Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
2.1.1.1. Defile
2.1.1.1.1. Miaino(me-ah'-ee-no)
2.1.2. Our culture today is one that celebrates that bitterness should be broadcasted.
2.1.2.1. My life so revolves around this anger and resentment that I have to invite as many people to join me in it
2.1.3. Jeff Bezos
2.1.3.1. People lose their kindness gene behind a keyboard
2.1.4. Hatred and holiness cannot coexist in the same heart.
2.1.4.1. When we invite people in to our bitterness, we are becoming as tumbling block in their pursuit of faith and peace.
2.1.4.1.1. One bitter person can destroy a LifeGroup
2.1.4.1.2. Can divide a family
2.1.4.1.3. Can ruin a marriage
2.1.5. Parenting interesting journey
2.1.5.1. Young kids
2.1.5.1.1. Exhausted
2.1.5.2. Teenagers
2.1.5.2.1. Were about to lose it
2.1.5.3. Then you wake up and have older kids that are leading
3. How do you kill a root of bitterness?
3.1. Expose the objects of your bitterness
3.1.1. Ephesians 5:11 (NLT) 11 Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.
3.2. Have we actually gone to the place of calling out why we are chronically paralyzed with this wound?
3.2.1. Bitter at God because you lost your parent to covid
3.2.2. Bitter because your older brother seems to do no wrong
3.2.3. Coworker got the promotion you worked for
3.2.4. Woman who is now dating your ex
3.2.5. Spouse who never acknowledges you
3.3. You cannot heal from what you are unwilling to admit
3.3.1. When you start praying about why you are bitter, the discovery may surprise you
3.4. Calling Pastor
3.4.1. I’m not in a good place
3.4.1.1. My thoughts are either victimized or judgmental.
3.4.1.2. Been there many times
3.4.1.3. Take a break. Clear your head
3.4.1.4. The problem wasn’t them, it was me.
3.4.1.5. My soul was depleted, and I was vulnerable to every offense.
4. With whom or what are you bitter?
4.1. Upside-down kingdom.
4.1.1. What Jesus mode led and the life that God’s Word teaches us to live is almost always opposite of human nature and culture
4.2. Great—serve
4.3. Someone slaps you
4.3.1. Give them the other cheek
4.4. Kill bitterness
4.4.1. Love
4.5. Hebrews 12:15 (NLT) 15 Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
4.5.1. Revisit last week’s graphic on forgiveness cycle
4.5.2. I’m forgiven
4.5.2.1. Profound gratitude
4.5.2.2. More accepting of others
4.5.2.3. Overflowing love
4.5.3. The following feel impossible unless our actions flow from a place of grace
5. Bless your offender
5.1. Luke 6:27–28 (NLT) 27 “But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. 28 Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.
5.1.1. Bless: eulogeo (yoo-log-eh'-o) to speak well of
5.1.2. One of the reasons we struggle with allowing a root of bitterness to grow is because we tend to compare sin. We compare what we have done with what other shave done
5.2. Sin is an archery term—to miss the mark.
5.3. The millimeter sin and the miles in both need the blood of Jesus
5.4. When you realize what we have been given, how dare we withhold it from someone else
5.5. The person that I have spent the most time being bitter toward is ME
5.5.1. Cindy is the best example I know of this. Book impact. You cancelled my debt. You never threw it in my face or used my betrayal as ammunition to hurt me. You spoke blessings over me and prayed over me. You extended me the grace God extended you. It was by your example that I was able to forgive myself.
6. True forgiveness is second hand.
6.1. Ephesians 4:31–32 (NLT) 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
7. Welcome
7.1. Introduce myself
7.2. Honor
8. Have you noticed that the world seems mad?
8.1. People seem angry with government leaders
8.2. Workers are angry with employers
8.3. Parents of teenagers...we’ve always been angry
9. Yearly average of investigated airline incidents143
9.1. Just since Jan1 of this year
9.2. Airlines have reported 3,715 incidents involving unruly passengers
10. It almost feels like bitterness within humanity is another pandemic we are now facing.
11. WHENBITTERNESSTAKESOVER
11.1. Psychology Today article:
11.1.1. All bitterness starts out as hurt.
11.1.2. And your emotional pain may well relate to viewing whoever (or whatever)
11.1.3. Provoked this hurt as having malicious intent
11.1.4. As committing a grave in justice toward you ; as gratuitously wronging you and causing you grief.
11.2. Anger- and resentment
11.2.1. Is what we’re all likely to experience whenever we conclude that another has seriously abused us
11.2.2. Left to fester , that righteous anger eventually becomes the corrosive ulcer that is bitterness.
11.2.3. Hebrews 12:14–15 (NLT) 14 Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. 15 Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
12. BITTERNESS IS A HIDDEN DESTROYER.
12.1. It’s interesting that the author of Hebrews refers to bitterness as a“ROOT.” Image of root system
12.2. Grew up in South Texas
12.2.1. Live oak tree
12.2.2. All roots lined up can equal a linear mile
12.2.3. In other words
12.2.3.1. It is what you can not see deep beneath the surface of the soul
12.2.3.2. Left unchecked, is slowly growing deeper and deeper and robbing you of the life God desires for you
12.2.4. In fact
12.2.4.1. You may have experienced a hurt, a disappointment, an offense..
12.2.4.2. You may not even know that an offense has taken root
12.3. Towing police.
12.3.1. I tow a pretty heavy boat in the summers.
12.3.2. I’ve done the math.
12.3.3. I know how much load my truck can safely handle
12.3.4. The pallet of concrete with a minivan.
12.3.5. The travel trailer with the Honda Pilot.
12.3.6. I’m physiologically affected by your poor planning.
12.4. Sometimes small
12.4.1. Sometimes life-paralyzing offenses
12.4.2. Family members abuse
12.4.3. Spouse’s betrayal.
12.4.4. Business partner deception
12.4.5. Bitterness is like drinking poison
12.4.5.1. Hoping it will kill your enemy