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RJ Circle by Mind Map: RJ Circle

1. Before

1.1. Why dialogue is important

1.1.1. what gets in the way of dialogue

1.2. Start with heart

1.2.1. Work on me first, use second

1.2.1.1. focus on what you really want

1.2.1.2. Ask: what did your motives become in the heat of the moment

1.2.1.2.1. have my motives shifted?

1.3. Master My Stories

1.3.1. understand how my story leads to action

1.3.1.1. path to action

1.3.1.1.1. see and hear

1.3.1.1.2. tell a story

1.3.1.1.3. feel

1.3.1.1.4. act

1.3.2. retrace your path

1.3.2.1. notice your behavior

1.3.2.1.1. "Am I in some form of silence or violence?"

1.3.2.1.2. Get in Touch with your feelings

1.3.2.1.3. Analyze your stories

1.3.2.1.4. Get back to the facts

1.3.3. come up with alternate stories based on the facts

1.3.3.1. tell the rest of the story

1.3.3.1.1. turn victims into actors

1.3.3.1.2. villians into humans

1.3.3.1.3. helpless into the able

1.3.4. Analyze your stories

1.3.4.1. look for common clever stories

1.3.4.1.1. victim stories

1.3.4.1.2. villian stories

1.3.4.1.3. There is nothing else I can do.

1.3.4.2. why do we tell clever stories

1.3.4.2.1. they can be accurate and match reality

1.3.4.2.2. they relieve us of responsibility

1.3.4.2.3. keep us from acknowledging ways we've sold out

1.4. Prepare

1.4.1. State My Path

1.4.2. RJ questions

1.4.2.1. What happened?

1.4.2.2. What were you thinking?

1.4.2.3. What were you feeling?

1.4.2.4. How were you impacted?

1.4.2.5. How can situations like this be prevented in the future?

1.4.2.6. What needs to happen to make things right?

2. During

2.1. Norms

2.1.1. speak from the heart

2.1.1.1. Speak not only with your head and ideas, but with your feelings. Share what is true for you based on your own experiences. When we speak from the heart we are aiming for eloquence, for choosing words that accurately communicate what we hold to be important.

2.1.2. listen from the heart

2.1.2.1. Try to listen without judgement; let go of stories that make it hard to hear each other. An open heart makes an open mind. Even if you disagree with what someone says, take it in before you react or respond.

2.1.3. trust you'll know what to say

2.1.3.1. Wait until your turn to speak before you decide what you are going to say. Trust that the right words--or the right silence--will come to you when needed.

2.1.4. say just enough

2.1.4.1. Keep in mind the limits of time and making room for everyone to speak. This intention is also called “lean expression.” It is related to “speak from the heart” because we often find that when we speak carefully we can express ourselves with fewer words than we would normally use, and that when we do our words often have more impact. Sometimes when we don't feel heard we tend to repeat ourselves.

2.1.5. welcome and expect different points of view

2.1.5.1. Circles welcome and accept all points of view. We speak primarily into the center of the circle, where our diverse perspectives simmer together, and from where there often emerges a shared understanding or sense of purpose.

2.1.6. 5 Guidelines for a Restorative Classroom Circle

2.1.7. Expect and Accept Non-Closure (race)

2.2. Learn to Look

2.2.1. Is the scene safe?

2.2.1.1. No

2.2.1.1.1. Silence

2.2.1.1.2. Violence

2.2.1.2. Yes

2.2.1.2.1. Dialogue can occur.

2.2.2. know the symptoms

2.2.2.1. what does it look and feel like when things become unsafe?

2.2.2.1.1. Physical

2.2.2.1.2. Emotions

2.2.2.1.3. Behavioral

2.2.2.1.4. know your style under stress

2.2.2.2. what does it look and feel like from others when they begin to feel unsafe?

2.2.2.2.1. others begin to retreat

2.2.2.2.2. by asking question, "are others safe?"

2.3. Share

2.3.1. State My Path

2.3.1.1. Start with the objective facts

2.3.1.1.1. Share what you were thinking

2.3.1.2. tell your story

2.3.1.2.1. Share how you felt

2.3.1.2.2. share the assumption you are making

2.3.1.3. ask

2.3.1.4. remain tentative

2.3.2. Who starts?

2.3.3. consider form to record important

2.3.3.1. what happened

2.3.3.2. feeling

2.3.3.3. impaccts

2.3.4. When sharing your views (relative to others' views)

2.3.4.1. agree

2.3.4.1.1. agree when there are points shared in common

2.3.4.2. Build

2.3.4.2.1. if others leave somehting out, agree where you share views, then build

2.3.4.3. Compare

2.3.4.3.1. when you do differ significantly, don't suggest that others are wrong. Compare your views.

2.4. Explore Others' Paths

2.4.1. Ask

2.4.2. Mirror

2.4.3. Paraphrase

2.4.4. Prime

3. Follow Up

3.1. calendar a day/time

3.2. check in with how things are going based on agreements.

4. General

4.1. What makes a conversation crucial

4.1.1. Anticipate that others will have opposing views

4.1.2. High Stakes

4.1.3. Strong Emotions

4.2. The importance Dialogue

4.3. Our brain on emotion

4.3.1. flipped lid

4.3.1.1. hand model of the brain

4.3.1.2. strategies for returning to thinking mind

4.3.1.2.1. ask questions

4.3.2. The biology

4.4. when it matters the most we do our worst

4.4.1. our stories lead to action

4.5. Relationships Are Central to Restorative Practices

4.6. Restorative Justice is Just a Pieces of the puzzle

4.7. Rebuilding (through understanding and Repair) Is better than Punishing

4.7.1. rebuild rather than punish

4.8. Dialogue Is Critical

4.9. Emotions

5. connecting web and cards and RJ Circle

5.1. safety

5.1.1. If someone is feeling unsafe, then pause and go to site (must be a card to prompt this)

5.2. Go over norms cards, and keep on display

5.3. support connecting during share

5.3.1. ways to connect card (agree, disagree, add on)

5.4. go over basics before hand on ipad

5.5. students bring paper RJ questiosn