this is the acid test
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Manfred Kets de Vries
Interview at TEDxAms
Reactions, Manfred kets de Vries is spot-on! "Pay attention to what's not being said. What's going on in the cloud" #EI #TedX, Interview in Volkskrant (in Dutch)
Watch this talk on YouTube
heroes, Bernie Madoff 150 years in prison, Rajat Gupta 2 years in prison, Raj Rajatnam 11 years in prison, Lord COnrad Black 6,5 years in prison, Jeff Skilling/Enron 24 years in prison
it is hard to learn the mind of any mortal, or the heart, till he bei tried in chef authority. Power shows the man - Sophocles
when people get power, bad things happen
why are so many leader self destructive?
why don't leader get the best out of their people?
why do so many executive teams function poorly?
why do so many organizations have a "gulag" (mind control) quality?
the HUBRIS effect, excessive pride / arrogance
Narcissism, ultimately falling in love with your reflection in the mirror
starting to live in a hall of mirrors
surrounded by yes-sayers, like Hitler in the bunker, hoping for mysterious weapons to come suddenly
the moment you are a senior executive, you are surrounded by liars!, keep this in mind
Samuel Goldwyn, "I don't want any yes-men around me. I want people to tell me the trurth, even if it costs them their job.", "don't say yes until I stop talking", "when I want your opinion I'll give to you"
need to deal with existential anxieties, executives wan to leave a legacy / create some meaning, fear of dying, what gets you out of the bed in the morning, fear of isolation / loneliness, how can I improve the relations with people I care about?, fear of not beaing in control
people need to learn to listen, listening with a third ear, like Buddha
you might need to change certain patterns, "the tragedy of life is that you only understand it backward but you have to live it forward" - Kierkegaard
approach is influenced by Frued, 11.000.000 impulse by second, disovered many people don't know themselves
use 720 feedback instead of 360, not only organisations, but also friends and family memebers, "if somebody says you have ears like a donkey, pay no attention. But if two people tell you so, buy yourself a saddle", depends on culture within the organisation
decide on how to use yourself as an instrument, become more emotionally intelligent, listen to what's not being said, pic up the subtle information, don't sovle the problem, using group coaching
stimulate quietness and daydreams, why, 18200 dreams a year, we don't remember most of them, we're living very rich life over there, someone is trying to tell something and we're not even listening, examples, Einstein conceived the relativity theory while daydreaming, Kekulé dreamed up the Benzene ring, see Wikipedia article, get leaders out of their sandbox
most of these things are not very new
"Know thyself", As stated on the temple of Apollo in ancient Delphi, it still is relevant today as it what yesterday
my grandpartents lived there
hid 13 people
grandather very talented to make double floors and double walls
mother tried to feed al those people
Conus eating his children
their next generation
what do you want to leave for your children/ the next generation
how would you like to be remembered
what kind of legacy do you want to leave