1. Fears
1.1. Of People
1.1.1. Tries to transmute fears of people into wants
1.2. For People
1.2.1. Fears for Narciso's safety
1.2.2. Thinks Theo can bloody well take care of himself
1.2.3. Fears Lamont is bad for Scarlet
1.3. Of Forces
1.3.1. Permanent death
1.4. Of Himself
1.4.1. That he will never be good enough
1.4.2. That he deserves to be alone
1.4.3. That he will destroy by loving
1.4.4. That he's lost whatever was good in him
1.4.5. That he'll kill himself again
2. Duties
2.1. To Loved Ones
2.1.1. Protect and serve his loved ones
2.1.2. Serve Theo well
2.1.2.1. Be a good husband
2.1.2.2. Be a good servant
2.1.2.3. Adhere to their contract
2.1.2.4. Respect his desires or lack thereof
2.1.3. Be a good lover to Narciso
2.1.3.1. Respect his desires
2.1.3.2. Respect his other lovers
2.1.3.3. Allow him the freedom of choice, even if he makes stupid choices
2.1.4. Be as scrupulously honest as he can
2.2. To Himself
2.2.1. Maintain physical health
2.3. To His Political Affiliations
2.3.1. Fight for the working man
2.3.2. Value life over tactical gain
2.3.3. Reveal dishonesty wherever it lurks
2.4. To Knowledge
2.4.1. Determine which kinds of knowledge merit sacrifice
2.4.2. Work diligently to learn what is currently unknown
2.4.3. Protect and preserve knowledge wherever it is threatened
3. Past Mistakes
3.1. Dereliction of Duty
3.1.1. Hasn't found Jakob's killer yet
3.1.2. Can't be the son his father wanted
3.1.3. Couldn't help Narciso when he was soulless
3.2. Misunderstanding or Miscommunication
3.2.1. Couldn't confess his love to Gabriel properly
3.2.1.1. Failure of dishonesty
3.2.2. Couldn't convince Merri that he loved her
3.2.2.1. Failure of honesty
3.3. Excessive Emotion
3.3.1. Couldn't bear letting Christer go
3.3.2. Couldn't bear losing Merriwether
3.3.3. Couldn't bear losing Gabriel
3.3.4. Suicide
3.3.5. Rage at his lovers when they suffer
3.4. Absence or Unconcern
3.4.1. Absent when Christer died
3.4.2. Absent when Jakob died
3.4.3. Wasn't there for Merri when she needed him
3.4.4. Wasn't there for Theo and Narci owing to being dead
4. Hopes
4.1. For His Projects
4.1.1. Find Jakob's killer
4.1.2. Write treatises on the cultures and history of the Neath
4.2. For His Relationships
4.2.1. Retain his friendships, insofar as they remain tenable
4.2.2. Provide sympathy and love where it is required
4.2.3. Learn to be forgiven
4.2.4. Settle things with Scarlet
4.2.5. Get to know Bar better
4.3. For Others' Well-Being
4.3.1. See Annelise cared for
4.3.2. See Cassius happy with Narciso
4.3.3. See G. Flynn capable of loving and forgiving himself
4.3.4. See Scarlet stay sane